you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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