and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
