Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
