How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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