so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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