Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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