guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Randomize
