Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
no you cant smoke seaweed
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize