dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
