She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize