Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
