I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
