it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
