Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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