UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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