Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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