I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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