Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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