I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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