Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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