im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
