Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
