New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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