it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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