Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Randomize