So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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