"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
