I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Randomize
