I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
That accounts for only three of the penises
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
