so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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