Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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