i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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