I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
