Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Randomize
