Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Man, jail baloney is awful.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
