I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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