I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
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