My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
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