Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
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