i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Randomize
