He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize