Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize