I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Randomize
