He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
My vagina just clenched in fear
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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