Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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