He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
