So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
