I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
