They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Randomize
