I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
